Sometimes there are certain things I want to run a crusade against. It’s kinda terrible how incredibly self-righteous I feel sometimes. Right now I want to battle against this tendency my siblings have to watch anime for long-hour stretches.
If I thought my siblings actually read my blog, I probably wouldn’t post this. I know that they think I am sometimes… well, ‘imperialistic’ is the phrase my brother sometimes uses. I am sure in my own opinion, and I imagine I must sound self-righteous and obnoxious, maybe judgmental. But I beg your patience. Think about skyping home so you can talk to your family, and your siblings seem… not very lively or talkative. They don’t say much, but from what you hear they seem to be spending a lot of time watching anime. I imagine it’s the feeling some people get when they realize how many hours a day someone spends on video games.
Frankly, it bothers me. I know my siblings, to a certain degree. I think if they just… looked elsewhere, there is so much they could accomplish. My younger sisters are really creative, they come up with stories. I don’t think they realize how envious I am of this ability. I struggle to create stories and characters, coming up with complete plots is hard enough- then there is a matter of making them good stories. It comes more naturally to them. Why, then, dull your brain on anime? Don’t let that talent go to waste! Don’t idle! There isn’t enough time in the world! As for my brother… he’s a good and smart kid. But he doesn’t talk to us a lot when we call home, and yet he spends a good amount of time skyping with his teammates on some sort of MMO game. And that bothers me.
How do I make them understand? It’s not my place to make them understand. And yet… it’s kind of horrible, it makes me feel a little detatched from them. Like it’s actually easier for me to associate with my collage friends. Is this part of the reason I sometimes have a hard time at home? Is this a syndrome that young adults face? They are at a time where they are learning much, and they are making important decisions, and progressing at a rapid pace, and then they look around at other people and wonder, “What are you doing?”
One feels a bit… separated when one’s at home. I would feel so weird, because I wanted to show my siblings a cool documentary that I found. And… I think that concept was a little foreign to them. Things are just… different these days.
I wonder if I’m experiencing what it is like to be on the other side of a generation gap. There shouldn’t be a generation gap, my youngest sibling is only nine years younger than I. Why does there seem to be such a distance? And why don’t I like it?
Sometimes I think there’s an old lady inside me, just waiting to happen. Is that weird? This old lady is very stubborn, it’s a mental mind set she’s gotten from years of experience. She’s sure her way is best, but she’s a tender-hearted soul, and doesn’t want her ideas to bother anyone else. This old lady can’t keep up with the fast pace at which technology is moving. She’s not disdainful of technology, but she refuses to let it take precedence over certain things in life. She feels she has learned much during her time, but is worried that nobody wants to listen to her, or understands. Yet she is content with the conclusions she has come to.